Stepping Forward

I was really upset after the fact that it came to the point that I had to block him from every possible communication route, but it has proven to be the best move I've made yet. My days are no longer interrupted with harsh and rude words and actions. I can put him and that part of my life out of my mind and focus on what my life is now. I have been hanging out with people that are a joy to be around and just been having a good time.

I move in a week into my new apartment so I have been focusing on getting everything ready and planned for that. I can not wait. I look forward to this step, I think it will be a big one for me. It will be the first time ever that I have lived on my own. That is scary, but also so very exciting. It will take a little time for the place to become mine, as most of the furniture and other household goods are coming from other people.

I spent all of last weekend shopping for bedding and other general items. It was fun. I could pick out what I wanted to have. Not worry about anyone else's tastes or opinions. I know this sounds selfish, but honestly it is a time for me to be selfish. It is a time to think about myself. Every step I take for me is a step I take towards healing, towards stitching up the wounds. There are still goals I have for my life and I am not going to be able to start working towards them until I am okay with me. I am getting there, each day brings me closer.

At the same time, I have been trying to not get to far ahead of myself. Just thinking one small step at a time and enjoy each passing moment.